Ten things not to do when making chocolate penises.

Yesterday I had two awesome authors- Alexandra Christian & Siobhan Kincaide-stop over and assist me in constructing chocolate penises for giveaways at FandomFest this coming weekend. Only for the adults mind you. But while forming these delectable male genitalia, I have learned a few things you should not do and wanted to share.

1. Don't think just because the chocolate penis is hard that it can be substituted for the real thing. (Hey I'm sure people have tried, but ...I wouldn't recommend it.)

2. Don't leave the hot chocolate penises out on the counter or your dog might decide to eat them.

3. Don't forget to add the cream filling before you add the second layer of chocolate or you end up with a gooey mess.

4. When done, don't let any children get a hold of the dicks on a stick because....well that just is so wrong.

5. Don't tell your husband you prefer the chocolate cock over his.

6. When sucking on the male genitalia in public, don't start making pleasure noises unless you truly want people to stare at you and think you are insane. But hey if it knocks yours socks off, go right ahead.

7. Don't give these chocolates to your grandmother for her birthday unless she's cool like that.

8. Don't think you won't get comments on facebook about your activity if you are posting pictures. Because people really have twisted minds.

9. Don't assume just because you like chocolate penises that everyone else does. Because some might want chocolate boobs. I don't have those molds so anyone that is expecting them to go with the dicks you're SOL.

10. Last, but not least, if you don't like what I have to say you are not invited to my house to make chocolate man parts with me.

I hope you enjoyed this little not to do list. Please come again.

Guest Post: Location, Location, Location by KD Grace

I had very powerful and gorgeous geological inspiration for my novel, Body Temperature and Rising. It, along with the whole Lakeland Heatwave Trilogy, is set in the English Lake District. It’s no secret that I’m totally in love with the place. Most of the locations in the trilogy are real places that I’ve walked and explored while there. However those real experiences in the landscape also inspired the ‘Magicscapes’ in the story.

Before I go any further, I’d like to clarify for my American readers just what a fell is, since there seems to be a bit of a language barrier, and some people have thought that the fells are woodlands. A fell is an upland stretch of open countryside, a moor or a barren or stony hill. And the fells in the Lake District are formidable. They include Scafell Pike the highest mountain in England! The word comes from Middle English and Old Norse and means mountain or hill. There! Language barrier crossed!

There are lots of places that inspired BTR I could talk about, all fascinating, all playing roles in the novel, all making my imagination race with ideas for more Lakeland stories. However, since I’m the happy guest on the fabulous Ravynhart site today, I would like to talk about one of the places that inspired some of the creepiest, most sinister, most magical scenes in the book, and even a scene of sex magic al fresco gone wrong. The Place is called Raven Crag. It’s on Thirlmere Reservoir in the Central Fells, not far the town of Keswick.

 

I’ve only walked it once with a friend of mine who works for Keswick Mountain Rescue. We walked it because the weather was bad and the visibility on the higher fells was not good. I don’t know how many walks I’ve done in the Lake District, but I’ve climbed at least a hundred fells, and Raven Crag is the first and only fell walk that I found truly creepy. The ascent up Raven Crag is a gentle ascent, and yet it feels heavy and thick, almost like one has stepped into another dimension. It’s a walk through dense dark evergreen forest, treacherous under foot because of masses of thick gnarled tree roots, exposed above ground. When we made our ascent several of us took spills because the roots were slick from rain.  

A little way from the top there’s a place where the trees give way to high grass and bog, which rises to a hill with earthworks where there used to be an Iron Age fort, though nothing is left now but the view of the beck running below. The bog, the dark thick forest, the mist that seemed always to be just waiting to descend made the whole walk seem other-worldly and silent. Knowing that I was writing Body Temperature and Rising at the time and that the hero in the novel, Tim Meriwether, also volunteers for Keswick Mountain Rescue, Brian was keen on telling some of the stories of rescues that he’d taken part in on Raven Crag. He pointed out one of the darker, danker parts of the wood where walkers had stumbled onto the body of a man who had disappeared several years before - a possible suicide. The team had been sent in to retrieve the corpse. The thing about Raven Crag is that it doesn’t feel like a crag at all. It’s too claustrophobic, too tight-fitting. It’s an easy ascent, not steep, and there’s no scrambling. However there’s only one way up, unless you’re a climber. At the top of the fell, the trees open up onto a precipitous cliff. Though it’s frequented by rock climbers, it’s also a suicide spot. Voila! I had the perfect location for sinister paranormal activity.

 

By the time we descended, back the same way we came, I found myself wondering if I was creeped out because of the stories Brian had shared or just because the place was spooky.  

Later, as I researched Raven Crag, one of my best sources of information was Alfred Wainwright’s Pictorial Guides to the Lakeland Fells. The guide to the Central Fells was written in 1958 by the man who knew the fells probably better than anyone else alive. His pictorial guides are not only still the definitive guides to the fells but are also exquisite works of art. Wainwright had this to say about Raven Crag. ‘The silence and gloom of the forest are too oppressive to be enjoyed. In the mist, the final stages of the ascent (no path) are dangerous.’

If Raven Crag creeped out Britain’s best-loved fell walker, then I figured there really was something spooky about the place, and it wasn’t just me.

The moral of the story is location, location, location. The Lake District offered me inspiration for everything from hot scenes of sex al fresco, to cave sex, to abandoned slate mines to creepy magical places for demon encounters, to glorious spring days with hawthorn in bloom and black birds in full song. It was the inspiration of such a rich and varied place that made the Lakeland Heatwave trilogy come alive in my imagination and made the magic seem so believable that I almost expected to read in one of Wainwright’s guide books about a chance encounter on Maiden Moor with a mysterious man in a vintage black suit.

Thanks again for having me on Ravynhart and for reminding me of the places that inspire me.

*****

American transplant to the Lake District, MARIE WARREN, didn’t know she could unleash demons and enflesh ghosts until a voyeuristic encounter on the fells ends in sex with the charming ghost, ANDERSON, and night visits from a demon. To help her cope with her embarrassing and dangerous new abilities, Anderson brings her to the ELEMENTALS, a coven of witches who practice rare sex magic that temporarily allows needy ghosts access to the pleasures of the flesh.

DEACON, the demon Marie has unleashed, holds an ancient grudge against TARA STONE, coven high priestess, and will stop at nothing to destroy all she holds dear. Marie and her landlord, the reluctant young farmer, TIM MERIWETHER, are at the top of his list. Marie and Tim must learn to wield coven magic and the numinous power of their lust to stop Deacon’s bloody rampage before the coven is torn apart and more innocent people die.

More info, excerpt and buy links: http://kdgrace.co.uk/books/lakeland-heatwave-book-i/

*****

K D Grace was born with a writing obsession. It got worse once she actually learned HOW to write. There's no treatment for it. It's progressive and chronic and quite often interferes with normal, everyday functioning. She might actually be concerned if it wasn't so damned much fun most of the time.

K D's critically acclaimed erotic romance novels, The Initiation of Ms Holly, The Pet Shop and Lakeland Heatwave Book 1: Body Temperature and Rising are published by Xcite Books and are available from all good paperback and eBook retailers.

Her erotica has been published with Xcite Books, Mammoth, Cleis Press, Harper Collins Mischief Books, Black Lace, Erotic Review, Ravenous Romance, Sweetmeats Press and Scarlet Magazine.

Find out more about K D Grace on her website, http://kdgrace.co.uk. She's also on Facebook and Twitter.

June Newsletter & A Contest or Two

Hi Everyone,

 

It’s already June and half of the year has already gone by. So far it’s been a pretty good year. I don’t have any complaints. I’ve had a few book releases and working on a few more that I hope to get out this year too even about Bigfoot. This past weekend I was at ConCarolinas where I was very pleased to hang out with a few other authors that I don’t get to see much, including my blogmates from the Disquieting Visions Blog. And I got to meet some great new authors like Rachel Aaron and was lucky enough to get a signed book from her. Haven’t started reading it though, it’s in my TBR pile for the moment.

June 29-July 1st I’ll be at FandomFest in Louisville, KY so if you’re in the area come on out and say hello. There will be goodies and books along with some other things at my table.

I’m making good progress on my horror novel called Death’s Dance and working on new shape shifter ménage within the Fur World books and including several characters from A Cat For All. So if you’re a fan of those, keep a look out for some more books.

Besides that, not much else going on just planning an awesome summer. Hope you all do the same.

Dark Blessings

Crymsyn

Updates:

A Lion’s Heart – is out with Amira Press.

Quaking Hearts: Storm Riders 4  – Will be available on June 23rd.

Currently Reading/Read:

Destined: House of Night by P.C. and Kristin Cast

Blood Lite: Overbite edited by Kevin J. Anderson

The Evil Inside by Heather Graham

Angelology by Danielle Trussoni

Movies watched/plan on:

 

Dark Shadows-  Loved it. I thought this was very funny and campy, but still great.

Prometheus – I like the Alien Movies so I really want to see this one.

            

Trick ‘R Treat- I love this movie. If you like Halloween tales check this one out.

Contraband  with Mark Wahlberg- It was okay. Thought it would be different.

The Innkeepers – ehh…It was good to rent. I wouldn’t buy it.

The Woman in Black- Even with Daniel Radcliff in the movie, it was pretty good. Not sure if I’ll add it to my collection or not. We shall see.

Contest  #1

If you want to do a webhunt and win some cool prizes, check this out.

Contest #2

Open to U.S. Residents  Only

I got some new swag in and giving away 3 of the below:

Goodie bag, pen, and key chain.

Leave me a comment with your email address about the Sneak Peek below.

Contest is open until June 30^th.

I’ll pick the winners and email you to get your addresses so I can send the stuff to you.

Sneak Peeks

Death’s Dance:

I threw down the pillow and climbed the stairs. “Look, whoever you are throwing my stuff around isn’t going to get me to pay attention to you.”

            When I peered into the office, I didn’t sense or see anyone. In fact everything was in its rightful place. My tarot cards were neatly stacked on the table. The crystals along the windowsill were still there. The bookshelves I had my books on and other things were still filled with dust. My laptop was still closed. But I noticed that my desk top was on and I had shut it off before I had gone to bed the night before. The screen blinked on when I stepped into the room.

            The monitor began to cloud over like my screensaver was made of fog. The way the mirror had misted over earlier. Another bolt of fear went through me. I breathed out and noticed my breath came out in a cloud of vapor. I ran my fingers over my arms from the small bumps that were raised along my skin. Something was definitely with me now. The sun was shining brightly on me and yet I couldn’t feel its warmth. All I could feel was the plummeting temperate. Something was trying to get my attention and whether it was the being from my dreams or the same one that had visited me in the mirror or the same one that was haunting Jackson it wasn’t going to leave me alone until I acknowledged it.

            “W-what do you want?” I hated to hear the fear in my voice, but I had never come across this kind of entity before. I had my share of darker ones and even a demon here and there. Those encounters had shaken me.          

            The temperature in the room dropped steadily. The windows began to frost over. It seemed the sun light had dimmed and wasn’t ever getting through.

            “Look, if you’re trying to scare me or make me run away then I’m not going to. If you’re the same entity that’s been in my dreams and was in my mirror this morning, then I demand that you tell me what you want. If not, get the hell out of my house and leave me alone.”

            The rolling fog on the monitor stopped and the screen lightened enough so I could see words forming on them as if someone had breathed on the monitor and was writing with their finger. I waited to hear the squeaking of skin on glass from the writing, but there was only silence in the room. It took a moment, but the letters formed into words.

            Death.

            “Are you death?”

            There was a pause. The atmosphere weighed down in the room. Watcher.

            “Okay. You’re a watcher. Do you watch me in my dreams? Is that you?”

            Yes.

            “Were you in my mirror this morning?”

            No.

            A shiver ran down my back. It could be lying to me. Whatever this entity was. It could be tricking me. Not all ghosts told the truth and I wasn’t about to put my trust in something that was coming through to me over my computer screen. Then again, I wasn’t going to open myself to it and see if it came through and wanted to use me as a channel either.

            "So what kind if a watcher are you?" I had one people saying they had phantoms they noticed were hanging around, I had spoken to one woman who had called me concerned  about the entity that she had noticed hanging around. But when I had gone to her house and asked the phantasm what it wanted, it said that it was just watching out for her. It observed her and didn't get involved with anything. Was this the same kind of being who was watching me?

            The fog cleared even more, but still I could see the figure whose writing on the other side of the computer screen. It seemed that there was a pause. The temperature in the room was a little lighter. Maybe he wasn't going to answer my question.

            "Why are you in my dreams?"

            Protect. Guardian.

            A strong compulsion to go over to the computer gripped me. The intrigue of what was being there and what did the entity mean that it was my guardian. How was it protecting me? What did it really want with me? There had to be an answer for that. I reached out tentatively and touched the computer screen. It was cold underneath my fingers, but when I pulled away from it, my fingers didn't stick to the screen. They weren’t being held there by some unseen force, but when I was I felt the pressure of a finger pressing on the screen and this time heard the distinct screech of a finger wiping over the screen. My heart stilled a moment as I put my finger over the words being formed. An electric jolt ran up my arm, but I was still free to pull my hand away.  

            "Why are you protecting me?" I sat down in the desk chair before the computer. It slid a little ways away from the desk. The mist cleared even more on the monitor and in the distance I could see the figure in the dark cloak that I had dreamed about. He was staring at me, but he made no move to come any closer. A small breeze wound though the room and jingling the wind chimes on my bookcase.  I had them there because every time I entered and left the room it was said that fairies would be drawn to the sound of the chimes. That and the sound wads pleasing to me. It helped me remember my grandmother because she had loved the tinkling sound so much. I glanced behind me and saw my hematite sphere rock from its base and then fall on the floor, land with a loud thud, and then roll over to my foot. I reached down and picked it up hoping that it wasn't damaged because it had fallen from the second shelf of my bookcase. The sphere was heavy and cool to the touch. There was no blemish to it. My reflection was distorted in its round exterior.

            "What does this have to do with anything?"

            See. Protection.